I wrote this a couple weeks ago and forgot to post haha
Alright, I haven’t really blogged in quite a long time, and I’m sitting around on a quiet Lake Powell afternoon, so I figured having time to write isn’t a good excuse today, and I should take advantage of it. There are some reasons I haven’t written and some excuses. I haven’t been trying as hard to make sure I’m writing as regularly (excuse). I have been writing some things, but I write shorthand and expand my thoughts into full sentences before posting, I haven’t taken time to do that either (excuse). A lot of the things I’ve been writing about are more personal than I want to post to just anyone on the internet, although if you’re curious and ask I’m an open book and willing to expand on a more personal basis (reason). So, here’s a five month update on various things.
I’ve done a lot of self reflection over the past span and it’s made me aware of the seriousness of many of my weaknesses that I’ve been downplaying in my mind. As result I’ve been trying to turn to the Lord more and do better, and the results have been positive. For example, I’d go back and forth at work feeling dumb and useless to smart and intelligent. Recognizing I’ve been promised the gift of intellect, I’ve prayed to receive that blessing a lot and I feel like the Lord has answered my prayers.
Oh work. I think the last time I posted work was still in pretty big drama and upheaval. Robert got fired, and Paul (dev lead) and Allen (CTO) have taken a much more active role in our day to day. A lot of false rumors were squelched. We hired six (yes six) new guys, and the results have been tremendous. Allen is not the greatest people person, but he IS an excellent CTO. I definitely feel like he is the man responsible for pulling the company out of a nose dive and getting us on a sustainable track. We just released EDGE 3.19 last week, which uses a completely different code base, build system, and deployment model. We can update daily now if we want. And we massively reduced the chattyness of the software. All around mandatory fixes that will save our bacon, and I’m real happy about.
Also at work, I feel useful and appreciated. Often Allen or Paul will bring me in for my opinion about something, when I’m just a standard dev. Or Paul knows he can give me management like tasks and I’ll follow through. All these changes combined basically mean my job is a whole new beast, and I’m definitely growing a lot.
Dating I can basically sum up with the same pattern. There’s been ups and downs. Great dates and ok dates. Sometimes I’m confident and sometimes I’m frustrated. There’s interests to pursue but I doubt they’re the ones. All in all I’m much more focused on submitting to the Lords will in this than I have been in the past, but I still lack patience frequently enough that I can’t really feel smug about where I’m at in this category.
I worked with Dr K on a special side project getting paid a buttload an hour and it was great. And I was debating doing grad school again. I even paid the $185 GRE application fee. But I decided the timing still isn’t right, and I’m just doing a masters to try and force my will on my life rather than God’s will; Or I have shame based motivations for doing a masters; Either way it didn’t seem right, so I haven’t.
Living with CJ Bryan and Josh has been the greatest living arrangement of all time. We’ve had so many great times whether with apartment friends, or just ourselves playing Dungeon Defender. Not to mention many neat late night chats. I’m sure my relationship with all three has been strengthened for life.
Lots of our new friends left on missions, we haven’t made many new ones over the Summer, but we have made some. Cj and Josh are moving out the end of this month, and we’ll get two of Bryans work friends as new roomies. I hope we can find our own mesh to have a similarly awesome experience.
Aaand I’m burned out writing haha. Good night Neverland!