Wednesday,
June 06, 2012
- “’You get
what you pay for’ applies to spiritual matters too.” – Elder Holland, October
2010
- “She gives
me presents, with her presence alone.” – Jack Johnson, Angel
Sunday, June
10, 2012
- At ward
prayer, someone shared a great talk from 1952 by President Kimball. It talked
about how often times we can’t see the end from the beginning, we just need to
take a step forward anyway. Nephi didn’t know how he’d get to the plates when
he went in. Moses didn’t know how he’d cross the Red Sea. There was no ram in
the thicket when Abraham went up to sacrifice his son. It was perfectly stated
too, but I tried looking it up and didn’t find it. The search on LDS.org is not
very good. It finds a bunch of hits with matching “the” and “of”s… but a 1952
talk might not be on there anyway :P.
- Was
thinking about what I could be doing better and singing O Lord My Redeemer in
the car, and the lyrics “And the more that I'd inquire, the hotter burned the
fire. I found joy, beyond compare.” Hit me hard. How can I expect answers if I
don’t ask questions?
Monday, June
11, 2012
- Me:
Procrastinate. It's the only logical course of action. Kate: what are you putting off? besides a fair
amount of sex appeal ;). Me: That was the best response, I have EVER received,
to any comment EVER
Wednesday,
June 13, 2012
- So I just
got an automated call that said “Hi this is Bob Bennett. I apologize for
intruding on our evening with a robo call but I think this is important.” And I
said “alright Bob.” And the call hung up, haha.
Friday, June
15, 2012
- I’ve come
closer to really believing I’ll never get married in mortality than ever before
during this past week. I dislike my lack of faith.
- Those who
followed Satan in the pre-mortal world lacked trust in God to get them to
eternal life. How often in mortality do we do the same? (prompted by Elder
Eyering Oct 2010 Sunday morning)
Saturday,
June 16, 2012
- Super
awesome day! It started with a great episode of Legend of Korra, and ended with
dinner at Neal’s place that night. But probably my favorite was mid-day. Micah
and Josh brought their friend Cullen, and I got Rob and Spencer (DnD with Steph
friends) over, and we made our crew for the Mistborn adventure game. It was
super fun brainstorming with that bunch of guys! I’m super excited to get to
play! But it won’t be frequent, lol. Thus far I don’t think we’ll meet up until
July 21st at the earliest haha.
- Dinner at
Neal’s was also good though. I wanted an excuse to see some Orem people. So we
got Todd Schriener, Camilla Meyer, and Jorden Hobush over. Me and Jorden are
supposedly going to go see the midnight showing of Brave (the new pixar movie)
Friday, so that should be fun too. But the best part of the whole thing was
after Neal took me back to my chair (I was stuck on his couch before) and we
got to talk 1 on 1 for an hour. It’s good hearing him talk about wanting to be
more motivated (church and life) although he doesn’t quite have the right
motivators around right now it seems haha. Especially with Andrew getting
married. P.s. Andrew Clark is engaged! Marriage in September. They won’t get
married in the temple at first L
Megan has a past. But as Neal understands it, Andrew is confident Megan is
re-committed and moving in the right direction. I hope it’s the case, Andrew
deserves someone who supports him in the gospel.
Sunday, June
17, 2012
- Another reason I love cats. Gambit sleeping, head on my shoulder, stretched out between my arm and my torso, with a paw on my face.
- So I’ve
tried the solving a problem per week thing. And it’s been TOTALLY SUCCESSFUL!
We found an apartment for me Cj and Josh. I took a half-day off and we all went
shopping 12-4. Finally settled on
Ventana apartments behind the Krispy Kremes near UVU. Way bigger than my
Wolverine Crossing place, just as close to the freeway, and I’ll even have the
roll in shower I want! Then the second week my objective was advertizing for
bowel care help. I got sick mid week so that slowed me down and I haven’t
posted these yet… But on Friday I made…
- If you
feast on the scriptures, they WILL tell you all things you should do. If you
look forward to scripture reading like you look forward to eating on fast
Sunday. If every day is a scripture fast, you'll be worthy of the above
blessing.
Monday, June
18, 2012
- Me: “OH
YOU REMINDED ME OF SOMETHIN... I'm shouting aren't I?” Sarah “You are what we
call cyber-shouting, yes.” Me: “Who does "we" include? I mean, I'd
assume you and I, since we're (<-- see the "we" in that?) the ones
having a conversation. But then if I'm included in "we", how is it
that I'm being introduced to a definition already established by we? So
confused...”
- I figured
out why there are more awesome and physically attractive women than there are
men. See, when someone lacks the standard "popular" traits, they tend
to make up for it by developing an awesome personality. Good looks is the
foremost requirement of "popular" people. My experience of girls as a
whole is they never believe they're as beautiful as they really are. So,
believing their looks less, they make up for it with awesome personality. But
in the end they actually have BOTH!
- Audrey
just called at random and apologized for “treating you like crap. And I don’t
ever say crap so that’s saying something.” And it was nice. I have felt stepped
on a lot and I was ready to let it just dwindle into whatever. But I also don’t
like holding grudges. So I’m happy to do my best to go back like it’s a clean
slate.
Wednesday,
June 20, 2012
- “All I
know is I don’t know how to be someone you miss.” Sappy Taylor Swift lyric that
resonated with me today haha.
Friday, June
22, 2012
- Still
pretty low on dating. I have an active run around type personality, so I tend
to be attracted to similar girls. However, girls like that tend to be attracted
to similar guys. Since I can’t actually run around and play ultimate Frisbee,
or soccer, or go hiking, etc, I can’t seem to hold said type of girls interest.
So it feels like I can’t have that type of girl. I also don’t want someone that
feels like I’m settling for someone though. Whoever I marry deserves to feel
like I love everything about them, I’m not good at faking genuineness. Anyway
it adds up to feeling pretty hopeless. This was spurred a bit because I don’t
think I have a chance with Alicia at this point when Marcus is interested in
her (and her back) and he can do all the things I used to do but can’t now.
Saturday,
June 23, 2012
- Youth
activity summit! Awesome activity. Some of my favorite highlight quotes
conveyed John Bytheway or Sheri Dew.
- “Regardless
of your original intention, you will eventually become what you surround
yourself with.” And “You are the average of the 5 people you hang around with
most.” These really make me wonder about what and who Neal and Micah surround
themselves with. But as far as I go? I think I’m doing ok. Not great but ok
haha. 5 most common
Sheri Dew:
“There’s a common lie that a ’balanced man’ deliberately guards against
becoming too righteous.” (Elder Carlos)
- Fun dating
activity idea. John Bytheway showed a clip from candid camera where people
would walk into an elevator and face the opposite direction, and see if people
would follow suit. It’d be fun to come up with and do some candid camera-like
activities.
- Suggested
number getting line I thought was fun haha "I'd love to get to know you
better. And I'd kick myself if I didn't get your number!" The dating coach
was fun, but her whole lecture centered on first interactions. I can get a
number if I really want, or go on dates. Making any of those turn into meaningful
relationships is the hard part.
Sunday, June
24, 2012
- Audrey is
still awkward around me haha. She just reacts differently than before to my
jokes or sillyness or serious comments or anything really. Goof.
- So
sacrament meeting is a good time to make and review weekly goals, this week
they were:
- Read a chapter in the BoM every day.
- Read a chapter in the OT thrice a week.
- Index a batch
- Temple (I only go bi-monthly)
And I totally did them all. I also like to
throw in a non reoccurring problem to solve, like fixing my car or deciding
where to move. Haven’t always hit those goals every week.
- Awesome
quotes from the fireside tonight with Dan Clark:
“If we
became what we thought about, I'd be a woman by now.”
“I was so
skinny I had to jump back and forth in the shower to get wet.”
“You’d make
a lousy someone else, so who is the real you?”
“Self esteem
and motivation don't change behavior. Behavior changes behavior.”
“There's a
huge difference between being discouraged or disappointed, and being
depressed.” So true by the way! I think people assume depression far too
quickly when it’s really just discouragement, I know I’m currently discouraged
:/.
“Ask not how
to get better but why should I get better, and the how follows.” 1 Nephi 3:7
- “Don't be
depressed about growing older. It will make you feel even older. Which is
depressing.” – Sarah Flinders Blog
Monday, June
25, 2012
- Try
reading scriptures out loud, like you’re recording it for posterity.
- I often
feel like there’s actually nothing wrong and I’m just a big whiner when I show
up to the doctors office.
- The weird
thing about having a 9-5 job is I’m used to change. Classes changing, routines
shifting… but with a 9-5, there’s hardly any change in routine. Weird. Note,
stuff I work on between 9-5 shifts all the time, and it’s very engaging, I love
being a developer J.
But the “work 9-5” block doesn’t change.
Tuesday,
June 26, 2012
- So I used
to date cute girls with low confidence, and I haven’t for years now. But I had
the thought I went for those girls because I had confidence in their potential.
Have I lost faith in them? Or become more selfish in my expectations? Or was my
preference shift really a good thing? I don’t know, or really care to answer it
right now since I’m not focusing on dating anyway, but it was an interesting
thought. And if I don’t write such thoughts down I stop having interesting
thoughts.
- Sat next
to Camilla from Ireland in institute. Every time she comments it makes me smile
haha. Accents are awesome.
- Had to
have CJ drive me to work in my new van today while my radiator was getting
fixed in my old van. And #1 I really dislike being a passenger, I’m way too
used to always driving haha. #2 since CJ was in Orem already, I spent the
majority of the last 2 hours of work asking team leads if they could use an
intern and telling them about CJ, then bringing CJ in and letting them have an
unofficial interview while I went back to work. He basically interviewed for 2
hours straight, but it was good, we talked about it the whole way home. We have
high hopes one will pan out :D.
- We all
have the light of Christ. One of it’s roles is to act as our conscience. One of
the easiest ways to chase it out is by blaming others. Did Christ ever blame
anyone for anything ever?
- Even with
the Gift of the Holy Ghost we still make mistakes, but it will warn us before
we ever make a big mistake (Boyd K Packer, 2011). I don’t remember getting a
warning before breaking my neck. I think that’s another small witness it was
meant to be.
- Learned a little tonight about the Holy
Ghost’s role as the Holy Spirit of Promise. Who seals our actions in this life.
This was a new one to me, I should learn more.
Wednesday,
June 27, 2012
- Work chat
highlight “I used to play video games, but then I took a wife to the knee”
hahah.
Thursday,
June 28, 2012
- Took the
day off and went to Yuba Lake for a Higgins family reunion. It was pretty fun.
I knew most everyone would be out on boats the whole time, and so I was excited
to play this “fourteen across” solitaire type game I learned at a previous
family reunion. But it was CRAZY windy! Like no fun to be outside windy, and
throw stuff off the table windy. I had my computer though, and I wanted to play
that game!! So I coded it up and managed to play twice (and fail, haha) before
my laptop battery died.
Friday, June
29, 2012
- I keep
waking up and feeling like after the events of the night, my life will now be
significantly different. But it’s not, and I can’t remember what about my
dreams would make me feel so haha.
Saturday,
June 30, 2012
- Fun day.
Josh is in Japan, so picked up Landon to play board games with me and Micah. We
played Stone Age twice and I won both, the first by a fair margin, the second
by ONE point! It was like 212 to 213 or something. After Micah left me and
Landon went for a walk haha. Discussed philosophy and video games place in our
lives (if any) and Andrew’s engagement and such… it was great. Then we came
back and played Carcassone with CJ… with FIVE EXPANSION PACKS! So many extra
rules! I got absolutely destroyed that game, CJ won by a ton, but it was fun.
Sunday, July
01, 2012
- I may have
wrote this already, but I reversed a previous dating conclusion recently. I’ve
talked long ago about how every girlfriend I’ve had was just a natural progression
to togetherness, I didn’t have to try to go on multiple dates before they
started to like me or I them, it almost always was just right up front there
was a connection that led to a relationship. However, this is like a Hollywood version
of relationships, and real life isn’t like the movies. So I decided maybe I
need to try multiple dates, or take out great people who I’m not drawn to yet
but think I could be. I’ve been trying that for a good while, it’s why I was
pretty much going on a date a week or more for quite a while. But this extra
effort stratagem doesn’t seem to be making any difference in my success rate.
So I’m stepping it back to “if I want to take them out, I will. But I won’t
force myself to try to find someone to take out if there’s no one that’s
genuinely calling to me.” Maybe I’ll switch back to focused dating again after
moving out, but this is the now.
- Can you
get an answer to a prayer about what to pray and fast about? It seems like
whatever you prayed about as a possibility, you didn't answer like "yeah
that's a great idea!" That being said, today I’m fasting about finding and
having the courage to participate in some sort of service. I’m still in a bit
of a slump. I’d like to lose myself in
something good, something not alone at my computer, and something service
oriented.
